The queen couldn't be interested less in aircraft, and wished us a bon voyage when we went out to the airport. Turns out she and Brittany were making brownies and pumpkin muffins while the guys were off doing 'guy stuff'.
I can't say who the pilot is or what he is doing here, but just put it this way : think of anyone famous you have ever heard of in the last 20 years, and he has probably been their pilot.
Yep. Him too. Uh huh. Him too. Yes, her many times. Them, too.
So we have been killing him with kindness at the Thai Inn, so he invited me out to give it a tour. If you think the outside is something, you should have seen the inside. Wish I could have taken pictures.
UPDATE : They are gone. What a beautiful, picture perfect take-off. Now I can post something that shows mere mortals are not cut out to pilot these things :
Piece of cake.
Don't forget : there are even more knobs, dials and switches above that didn't make it into the picture.
There is a panoramic picture of wet, drizzly Dillingham, Alaska taken from the impressive camera of my new iPhone 5. You cannot imagine how much I appreciate 50's and rain as opposed to the Iowa norm of 80s to 90s and 100% humidity without rain.
As the saying goes, you never have to pay for air conditioning as long as you live in Alaska. ;-)
I should mention that is Little Airport Road. It is called Little Airport Road for two reasons : it's not very big, and it used to be the airport runway for Dillingham back in the day. I wouldn't want to try it today, unless you had hella shock absorbers with about three feet of travel on the plane. Hell, I won't do more than 10 MPH on it in a car.
Pothole-O-Rama!
That brings up another thought. The Dillingham Police are really, really good at spotting drunk drivers. They have to be. They have had years of practice honing that skill by picking out the true drunks from the people swerving to avoid potholes in the road. After all, why fill potholes when nature is going to pack them with snow and ice in another month or so?
Well, as you may know by now there are only two ways to get in or out of Dillingham. One is by boat, and the other by airplane. Necessarily, this means anything you want to ship here - like items from Amazon - have to arrive in like fashion. I have noticed recently that Amazon is becoming more and more selective about what they will, or perhaps more importantly WILL NOT ship to Alaska.
At first I understood this, because the US Postal Service is the ONLY way any package gets to Dillingham. It stands to reason if the USPS gets uptight about shipping things like explosives, firearms, or alcohol then retailers who sell those goods will not be able to get them to Dillingham. Again, this is perfectly understandable. I have no beef with the retailers, because the USPS sets the rules.
But this :
I mean, what the hell Amazon? Why in the world can't you ship me a friggin' dust mop? Look, there is no post office restriction against mailing dust mops. I checked. It's not made of lead, so it won't cost $100 to ship it. If it is a matter of shipping costs, I would pay a little more for a Prime account and get it here.
It's not just this item. More and more I am finding the goofiest stuff is now verboten for us at Amazon. In fact, I am pretty sure I could get a lead brick shipped here by Amazon. Sure enough. I just checked. I can get a lead brick shipped here - FOR FREE!
So in light of this new information, Amazon, I am again inspired to ask you : what the hell?!
There are only two ways to get to Dillingham : By water, or by air. Logically, it follows if you want to get out of Dillingham, you must go out the same way. So here are few pictures of what it looks like to get out of Dillingham by air.
This is the Dillingham Airport. No, really.
This is what it looks like to walk out to the plane. Note the baggage loading on the right.
Preparing to taxi.
Breaking through the clouds and fog.
They always want me to sit on the wing. Not good for pictures, good if you want a big, strong guy to get you out in an emergency situation.
In winter, this is pretty much all you see while going to Anchorage or coming back.
Ted Stevens Airport in Anchorage. A little bit of an upgrade from Dillingham.
Looking out at the mountains in the background from the main terminal of Ted Stevens Airport in Anchorage.
So we are in Anchorage so I can attend the ASTE Conference. We didn't know until we got here it was also the Fur Rondy time as well. Fur Rondy is the Fur Rendezvous, which is kinda-sorta like the Muscatine County Fair, Buckskinner's Reunion and Great River Days all wrapped up in one, 10-day party.
We happened across the start of the Fur Rondy Dog Sled races while coming back to the hotel after lunch. Just like with our dog sled ride, you had best have something big or heavy or a combination of the the two just to stop these champions once you have them in a harness. Until the start, it looks like they anchor down these dogs with a snowmobile they fasten to the sled, which is fastened to the dogs :
Oh, how they howl, whine, bark and generally create a cacophony to let you know it's time to run. Run! Right freaking now!
Keep in mind that if the dogs want to, they can still MOVE the snowmobile, just not without exerting a great deal of effort. So yeah... basically, you have to drop a boat anchor that would sink an aircraft carrier to keep them from running away.
Winter Greyhounds. I swear that's what they remind me of. They may not be actual Greyhounds, but they have all the grace, and about a billion times the strength, stamina, and motivation of any Greyhound. In short, when it's time for them to run - get the hell out of the way!
So this is what it looks like to be in the cargo area of a dog sled :
Simply put, when the dogs are fresh, frisky and wanting to show off for you there is nothing on this Earth - I mean nothing - that accelerates with as much G-force as that dog sled. It'll snap your neck, man. You go from 0 - 20 in about 0.2 seconds.
We also learned these dogs are unique in mushing world, in they do not fear to blaze their own trail. According to our musher, the dogs that run the Iditarod WILL NOT leave the trail. You cannot force them off it. These dogs, on the other hand, are more than ready, willing and able to leave the beaten path and merrily drag you across God's creation on command.
There is nothing they love more than being commanded to do exactly that.
Lacking any other practical means, one literally has to throw the anchor overboard to bring these eager canines to a permanent halt. When they want to run, they want to run and brook little interference from you on the subject. While their stamina may be long, their patience is short in equal measure. They will accept brief respites to rest, but their collective minds are of but one thought : run.
When choosing which 10 will be the lucky few to go running, every dog puts on his or her best show and pleads to be let loose. Pick me! I can run! Let me show you how I can run, Master! I will run like the wind today, and twice as fast tomorrow! Oh, the cacophony.
Once harnessed, you discover the enthusiasm was not a charade. If the musher does not set anchor he will soon be short one sled, and one team. Muscles tense. Sinews tighten. Anticipation builds until... until... RAPTURE! Master wants us to run!
So a real, true blizzard hit us on Monday. This is Friday evening and we are still digging out. Here's a few examples :
It's the first time I have seen a "no parking because of falling snow" sign, but as you can see from the snow almost reaching the sign, they aren't kidding. When it falls, it's not going to be a light dusting. It could be up to a ton of snow falling at once. There's no way to predict how much will fall.
Remember earlier when I said I had never seen it rain for days on end until I hit here? Well, it doesn't rain a whole lot at a time, but it rains and rains and rains in a gentle fashion. Truly, it's like a soft, drenching fog. Well, add in freezing temperatures, and 50-80 MPH winds, and suddenly it's like walking in a snow tornado.
There isn't a lot of snow falling in any one hour, but when you talk about a week's worth of hours you are suddenly talking about metric crap-tons of snow. See that third picture down? That's a shot from our apartment windowand the snow nearly makes it to the bottom of the window... which is about six feet off the ground. That's a lot of snow.
Let us know if you would like to have some, and we will see if we can ship it down your way.
Here is what certain members of my family (who shall remain nameless for the time being) think our bathroom looks like :
And here is the reality :
Of course, these could possibly be the same people who thought we were caught up in the BIG EARTHQUAKE that was, in reality, hundreds of miles away. At one in the morning (our time). While we were asleep. That caused a SIX INCH tsunami over in Kenai.
